


Pieces

by 500daysofharry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-14
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 10:57:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1044025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/500daysofharry/pseuds/500daysofharry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis made my heart flutter and my stomach ache with every metaphoric knots tightening inside me, I longed for him to be mine, he was captivating and consumed my thoughts, he was the person I fell for and this is how he came to be the pieces of me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Brown Leather Journal

Chapter One

Brown Leather Journal

He kept his journal discreet and never spoke a morsel of it, his nose buried in the pale pages constantly darting his eyes up and down with the fasting motion of his hand scribbling every which way, he made subtle sounds but then returned to silence when he had achieved a potential point in his writing.

I caught a glimpse of his passages from time to time, astonished with every twisting and twirling from the four corners of the paper he managed to cover leaving no spaces blank. He would sometimes sense a wave of paranoia and close it quickly before flashing an awkward smile and chuckling. He was quite secretive and relentless to show me what was written, but I had no desire to question him or whether I'm allowed to shuffle through it, I just left him be.

When we traveled around to destinations either sprung onto us spontaneously or were required for our line of work, he always brought his bounded book anywhere and everywhere with us no matter the length of the trip. It was by his side clasped in his hand or pressed hard against his chest, it was a part of him and he couldn't bear to lose it.  
With every passing of the years the tattered leather journal began to fade beyond repair, becoming unbinded as the strings weakened and the leather cracked from the obsession of squashing it into bags and back pockets. It's once mocha color now transformed into a caramel hue as it got flung around through the best and worst of times, but it never lost it's potential to him.

It became a person to him instead rather then a journal. 

He started to inscribe things on it, the words one and only were scribbled along the spine and the word please was on the front flap, he even gave it a sea of stars to appear picturesque to add more depth to it's character. Every chance he got he tried to explain to me how real it was to him and how it meant everything to him, I always stared at him in a puzzled way as he rambled on.

He was fantasizing to witness in his designated state of mind, he was beautiful and content with the fascination of capturing every moment and share it solely between himself and his journal. He told me at times that one day when he passes on that it will belong to me, that I will be the caretaker, he said that I was to be the only person he trusted to have his journal.

I always worried about him though, he was constantly drawn inside it closing himself off from the world and I was for some reason, questioned if I should help him or not but I never did, it was never really my business I found that this was his way of expressing himself, a way to escape from the world.  
His mind must have been a wondrous place to explore and his eyes glossed with radiate as he visioned no evil but rather compassion.

But as we continued on, the day he told me about happened and I swore to myself that it wouldn't come true. He was lost and never found and I was now the keeper of the journal, the person to it. He had left the earth only leaving behind a crummy book with the written memories forever inked for me to read.

He no longer would exist, he no longer would be that boy surrounding himself in pages with ink smudges on his nose and he would no longer be my other half.  
What I held in my hand was all I had of him and I was finally given a chance to wander inside his enthralling mind, the mind he distant not only the world from but me as well.

As I stood on the balcony with the book balanced between my thumb and fingers I glanced up at the twilight sky and for every star I said a wish, a wish for him to come back, but he never showed, he never snuck behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist or rest his head on my shoulders and softly sang to me, he never kissed the small wrinkles in between my eyebrows when I tensed up from his warm embrace, he never showed up.

I was alone with only the moon accompanying me in my wounded time of need, I collapsed down onto a chair left in the corner outside and turned the knob on our lights to dim the area just enough to not bother the neighbors and to where I was easily able to read.  
I unsettling snugged the book spine on my legs and breathed in and out slowly before lifting the edge of the front cover flap open. The pages were covered in blotches of ink and smudges of pencil and smelled of him. 

The corner of my eyes began to sting and I sniffled quietly as I flipped through the crinkled pages. I appeared on a page labeled with my name and I knew that I had arrived at the starting point of my journey, my journey into his brown leather journal.


	2. Louis

Chapter Two

Louis,

There was a boy named Louis who I fell for and who I longed to be mine, he was exquisite and compassionate and his face glistened like the morning dew on a single blade of grass.

I was captivated and aware that by choosing to fall for such a peculiar stranger would be questioning if my heart knew that it could break into indefinite pieces, pieces in which could never be mended even if the very veins in my body were to reconnect them together. 

But as naive as I condemned myself to be, I encouraged my mind, body and spirit to interact with such a kind tender soul and to not be frightened by the outcomes but, to instead replenish in the given experience of love. 

Louis made my heart flutter and my stomach ache with every metaphoric knots tightening inside of me. He had consume my thoughts and inhabited my life and I wanted him to belong to me more then anything.

The triumph and fall of how we came to be is written for your eyes to wander and your mouth to mumble with the motion of your fingers to touch, these pages hold the words I was to shy to share with you.

This is how you came to be the pieces of me.

Signed forever yours and always,

Harry Styles

xoxo


	3. Dandelion

Chapter Three

Dandelion

 

It was said that the seeds of a dandelion held the whispers of a person's true desires, the dreams and hopes of their lost souls itching for a sense of realness or some sort of purpose in their lives. 

But it never came to be. 

The realness of the situation was never issued and instead they were presented with disappointment as everything appeared the exact same. It was the bittersweet truth and sadly how the earth lived, its as if you craved these needs and wants but were never given them.

You can dream wildly or hope hugely or wish till the point your bones break but overall all you'll be left with is the emptiness of nothing.

Nothing seemed so vast, it was our cloak to shield us with as we were all nothing, we came into this world with nothing and will leave with nothing. 

Nothing was our answer for everything.

I was one of them, sharing the desires I encompassed myself with and the desires I swore myself would improve my life for the better but it never occurred. 

As I cuddled myself on the carefully woven fleece blanket, I grabbed at a wad of dandelions and wormed them around above my head, engulfing my face in their seeds and stared at them as they fell depressingly off as weakened and frail.  
I brought one to my lips that hasn't completely given up and whispered delicately, ''I want to be loved by someone, someone who finds me worth being with.'' Then blew on it lightly as it floated away reaching higher and higher in the sky.

I saw you from across the way tuckered under an umbrella of leaves as the tree branches hung above you and you were slumped over reading a book. The sun peeking through and warming your face as your eyes were focused on the pages, your lips mouthing them and eyebrows furrowed with every aggressive turn of them. 

I was falling for you, but you weren't falling for me.

In frustration you grabbed at your hair in a fit of anger and tousled it around until you reached the end of your book then closed it. You tossed it by your feet and began to scream at it but then sat up and shrugged your shoulders as you bit into an apple. You bobbed your head up and down and peered around the area fancying the world, you seemed at ease and rested your hand on your leg as you tapped your feet.

Our eyes from time to time crossed paths and although it wasn't planned, it was as if we were drawn to see one another and with the short interaction we shared, you flashed me a friendly smile and I exchanged one to you as well.

That was our first encounter.

After time had passed I brushed myself off and collected everything before turning away and leaving the field behind. As I shuffled my feet through the dandelions I stumbled over your book and knelt down to retrieve it then began to turn it over in my hands in a curious way.  
I drew my arm nearer to you and presented your book with a shy smile as you thanked me and grabbed at the spine. Our fingers touched lightly and I kindly curled my fingers on yours as the side of your mouth rose up. I started to mumble a series of useless knowledge before stepping backwards and apologized for interrupting you.

With no hesitation, I said a quick farewell and hurriedly walked away in utter shame with full embarrassment as I contemplated with myself over every wrong thing I did. But as I was reaching close to home I heard a voice calling for me and turned around to see you rushing over to me half out of breath, struggling to get some source of words out.

You grabbed at your waist as your chest pulsed back and forth and you asked me for my name.

''I'm Harry.'' I said.

You then whispered Harry under your breath and nodded in agreement and I chuckled and asked for your name.

You cleared your throat and said, ''I'm Louis.'' Then smiled.

I was pleased to have the name to the face it was a sense of realness and not a foggy figment of my imagination. You wandered inside my mind and never left, you held me down to earth and gave me hope that all my time wasted on whispering to dandelions was worth something.  
We directed ourselves to a wooden bench and spoke for ages covering the whole aspects of things, we enlightened our minds on things that we thought couldn't be possible and we brought one another company when no one else would.

But as the world darkened around us we had to say our farewells, and as you pulled me in close with an encouraging hug you whispered in my ear, ''When can I see you again?''  
And as I tighten my grip around your waist I whispered back in your ear, ''In the morning, I'll be sitting in the dandelion fields waiting for you, come see me.'' And you nodded your head.

Our arms started to become numb as they drooped down to our sides and we turned our backs around to go our separate ways. I stopped and glanced over my left shoulder one last time and witnessed you disappear around the corner.

But all I was able to think about in the tender moment of time was how beautiful the back of your head was.


	4. Heart

Chapter Four

Heart

On those gloomy days where the clouds shadowed over my head and drenched me in all my faults, I became distant and lost as I was unable to feel compassion towards you and instead closed you off leaving you to drown in the rain. I was unsteady and wandering as I plagued myself with the carelessness of you never being able to love me or to be loved by anyone. 

A person like you should never belong in the company of someone whose as impractical and futile as I am but, in the company of someone who has meaning and softness to tend to your open heart, your thoughtful heart who I desired to be in place of mine. 

In spite of it all we should have been nothing more then a forgotten encounter on that warm day in the dandelion field, we should have never opened yourselves up to one another, and we should have never existed.

I wish you never asked to see me again.

I was broken and unmendable as tears started to form in my eyes and I was perplexed over what they were for, I was clouded with a string of things and couldn't fathom if they were for a good or bad reason. 

You witnessed me in a vulnerable state and rushed over towards me as you knelt down to cuddle me in close to your chest, presenting me with abundance of security and endearment. I hiccuped every so often as you started to shush to compose me then trailed your fingers alongside my spine and faintly hummed.

The area was still and suddenly you had stopped before you brought me up to eye level and raised your right hand, grabbing at the left side of my face. As you ran your thumb down my lips you spoke in a devoted tone.

''I wish you knew how much you are loved and how much I'm falling for you.'' Then you ran your tongue on the inside of your bottom lip and gulped before kissing the side of my temple with ease.  
I sat there with puffy eyes and quivered mouth as you grabbed at your chest then pulled away and in a palpitating action offered me an invisible heart, the one heart I aspired to have.

You smiled and through tears said, ''For you.'' And I mutter back, ''No I can't Louis.'' As I scratched at the back of my neck. You then pierced your lips together in discontent and grabbed my hand and opened it up as you placed it on my palm then closed it tightly.

''I want you to feel my love Harry, I want you to know that I'll always be here and I want you to have my heart.'' You leaned in and softly said as you fiddled around with the chain on my necklace then pushed yourself up and left.

''But I don't deserve it.'' I mumbled under my breath and leaned back on the ground crossing my arms against my chest.

I held your heart, figuratively speaking, but I still held your heart and I was to never let it go. But as indifference as this situation is perceived to be I was implied that you loved me more then I could love myself and that contrived me as being a coward.


	5. Sun and Moon

Chapter Five

The Sun and The Moon

Once a day and once a night cradled in the infinite universe was a sun and a moon.

Both drawn to one another's beauty, captured by their indifference's as the sun brought warmth and happiness and the moon brought luminous and passion. But the tale of these two has a mildy disadvantage, although they both share the same sky, they can never share it at the same time, one can only be above while the other one watches below.  
But every so often there comes a time when they are given the opportunity to share and when they do, the world becomes at peace and still as their company brings the meaning of life and love to all that surrounds them.

As the early hours begin for the sun, he rises up to fill the iridescent sky with himself and welcomes the gift of sunlight to the many humans inhabiting the earth just below him. They stretch and yawn as they awake from their slumber and spread open their curtains, groaning as their body takes in the sun's warmth.

The clouds start to reel in and bring the sun company, assuring him that in this massive horizon, he wouldn't be alone and that made the sun shine brighter and give purpose for the world. The world was content and friendly, and nobody thought any less or more of you as you staggered around, they simply kept to themselves. People smiled in the sun's glory as they went about their daily commutes allowing the sun to follow their every movement, but as the day passes by like the watches of busy bystanders lost in their lives, the sun slowly frowns and falls back to his murky hiding place as he becomes eclipsed for the night.

As the last hours begin for the moon, he soon rises up and illuminates the vast starry night and offers passion as people settle in close into their companions embrace, contemplating over their tender encounters and exchange intimate moments. Their bare bodies only longing for one another and hearts subtly beat as their eyes trail up and down from the top of their head to the underside of their toes.

The moon slightly becomes amused as he witnesses the world at it's finest and exhales in a relieving tone as the people drift off for the night. The stars scattered around encasing him in a sea of celestial body as they befriend him and shine amongst his side, intrigued at what they had created. But underneath them the sun scoffs and becomes enraged with envy as the stars surround the moon and not him. The sun yearn for the moon but the moon never seemed to notice him leaving a hole in the sun's heart.

But as time goes by, the night changes back and the moon falls while the sun rises and during the brief transition, the sun and the moon emerge into the same atmosphere, inhabiting the same line of vision and the sun musters up the courage to speak.

''It seems as if every time I fall, I fall for you Moon, but you never seem to care.'' The sun said.

The moon becomes confused and lost in the sun's words as he replies back carefully.

''I do care Sun, I care every night, I attempt to get your attention but you never notice.'' The moon slowly begins to draw closer to earth as the sun slowly rises up.

''But how can I when you have the stars to accompany you, there are millions of them and only one of me.'' The sun sadly informs.

''You don't understand, those stars every night connect together to form thousands of hearts simply for you but you never see them and that leaves me out of sorts.'' The moon explains.

The sun reaches the sky and incandescent the world as he peers down and speaks back at the moon with a bit of baffle in his voice.

''Those hearts are for me?'' He questions him.

''Yes, always for you.'' The moon says and smiles.

The sun becomes engulfed with fondness and bliss unaware that those sea of hearts were for him and only for him. He was in a bit of a frenzy and unable to comprehend how much the moon was falling for him and shamefully felt as if he betrayed him for being so cruel and quietly apologized as the moon tuckered securely down and quietly whispered.

''Although I am immersed with countless number of stars, please always know that they will never compare to you, I only belong to you.''

The sun fell silent as he glanced past the given horizon and inhaled the world as he was able to see the delicacy of it and knew at the softening moment how he had reached happiness.

''I will see you again sun.'' The moon spoke once more and closed his eyes.

Then the sun soon smiled and replied back, ''As will I, moon.''

 

Always. The word that defines this tale, as in I will always fall for you as if it was the first, as in I will always love you indefinitely, as in I will always belong to you whether it's in life or afterlife. I will always be yours.

This was the tale that defined us, these two separate pieces attaching together and becoming whole, you were the moon as I was the sun.

You found this tale to be endearing and advocated until your eyes watered and throat became parched for me to tell you this every morning and every night and I willingly accepted with pride, because in the smallest of things I was drawn to you Louis and desired nothing more then to tend to your needs.


	6. Thinking

Thinking

Chapter Six

You were wondrous about things, all sorts of things for that matter, whether it was misconstrued as being far fetched or something as small as a seed, you were always thinking. There was never a dull morning or night where you weren't consumed by thinking, you were hinged to it and unable to release yourself from this door frame attached inside your astonishing mind. There were those days where I was marveling if you were possibly thinking about me, fantasizing about me, undressing me but it never seemed to be the case, your mind was elsewhere besides on me.

I could spend hours upon hours, even days if I could manage, staring at you from a distance, being drawn to which ever you were doing, you made the simplest things the utmost riveting and beautiful.

Your mouth casually mumbling hushed words as your eyes, your marvelous eyes circling around the area occasionally landing upon mine and you slightly waved your hand towards my way and held it still in the air until you broke eye contact and ventured back to what you were doing.

The strands of your hair falling from your delicate hands as you tousled it back and grinned, you were now thinking about our short encounter, I had inhabited your mind. Your body leaned against the back of the chair as you brought your hand under your chin and fiddled around with your stubble while you motioned me over with your pointer finger and patted against your thigh. I denied and pushed myself up as I headed past you and ran my fingers through your hair.

You moaned quietly and grabbed at my waist as you reeled me down onto your lap and brought my face closer to yours. Your lips moisten from the tip of your tongue as you leisurely brought them in contact with mine and placed your upper lip onto the space in between them, moving your jaw up and down with the motion of mine. I held onto the back of your neck as the kiss transformed into a deeper tension rather then a soft kiss and we were lost in passion. As you pulled back and slowly opened your eyes, you released a quaint smile.

''Louis, do you ever think about me?'' I questioned towards you as I fidgeted around with your bracelet.

''Of course I do.'' You bluntly replied.

''That seems hard to believe.'' I told you in denial.

''Well it's not.''

The tone in your voice was damaged with a bit of hopelessness and your eyes became vacant as you nibbled at the inside of your cheek.

''It's not?'' I asked you and brushed an eyelash from your cheek and blew on it. 

''I think about you all the time Harry, I think about your eyes and how they meet with mine, I think about your lips and how they fit perfectly with mine, I think about your hands and how they touch me in all the right places, I think about you when I try to not think about you.'' You explained to me as you rubbed your thumb across my collar bone and pulled me down onto your shoulder. 

''I'm always thinking about you Harry.'' You finally said.

''I think about you too Louis.'' I mumbled as I intertwined my fingers with yours and brought you up, directing the both of us inside the bedroom and we carelessly fell onto the bed, tangling our arms and legs around each other. 

We masked ourselves in silences and began to indulge our minds into thinking, sharing and suggesting until we became jaded and instead fell asleep to the sound of one another breathing.

In the mist of it all, thinking was by far your finest quality.


End file.
